Documenting my life

Category: habits (Page 1 of 2)

The 100 day challenge – end 2022 with a bang

There are 100 days left in 2022. How are you doing? If there is something you wanted to accomplish this year, but haven’t gotten round to it, this is your reminder that it’s not too late: you have exactly 100 days before the end of the year. 

What could you do in 100 days?

100 days is a great timeframe to achieve significant goals. You can go from being a literal couch potato to being able to run 5K easily (you can read my week by week experience including setbacks, learnings and tips, here). You can start a blog, finally get your business up and running. What would your life look like in a 100 days, if you committed to doing a 15 minute workout every day? Or if you did the 5 minute journal daily and set the main priorities for the day, then followed through and reflected on what you could have done better? What would happen if you stopped being on your phone from 9 pm and read a book or picked up another hobby instead? Maybe you want to use these 100 days to go to bed one hour earlier or have an energizing morning routine. 

Why 100?

A hundred days is a great milestone for any habit or activity you want to do regularly. It’s enough time to make a significant impact, but it is also doable, a challenge you can take on, knowing it can be completed successfully. It will allow you to say goodbye to 2022 with a bang, proud of having achieved something cool in a short amount of time!

Focus on one thing

What is the one thing that would have the highest impact?

Focus on that, let that be your one priority. Sure, you can have multiple goals and other things you want to improve, but it’s important to define the one that is the most important and impactful. On the days when you will be tired, busy, or something else gets in the way, being able to know what to focus on, while dropping the other tasks, will allow you to maintain momentum


Find something you are passionate about, and make it measurable

This point is self explanatory, but it’s obviously important to set yourself an inspiring challenge. Pick something you really want to do, something you know will help you moving forward and something you will be proud to have accomplished. Take some time to reflect on why this goal is important to you and how it will benefit you. 

The other important point to consider is how you define the goal. Wanting to eat healthy or exercise more are great things to strive for, but it is difficult to know exactly what to do and it is not easy to figure out if you have done it or not. Instead, a measurable goal, like “go to the gym three times a week, for 30 minutes minimum” is a clear goal, that will take away the stress of figuring out what to do, and allows you to focus on actually doing the thing. And you will be able to know if you have done it or not, with no doubt

Track and review

As with many things, tracking will help you see two things.

  • 100 days is a finite and relatively short amount of time
  • You have already accomplished your goal for x many days and you can be proud of that.

Tracking will also come in useful when you do your weekly review, to know what went to plan and why something might not have gone as you had imagined. This will allow you to get curious and brainstorm how you can improve the following week.

If you liked this article, please sign up to the newsletter for monthly round ups and extra interesting snippets, and follow lauraslearnings on twitter to be updated on the latest post. 🙂

If you decide to take on this 100 day challenge, I’d love to know what your goal is, please leave it in the comments below!

My Couch to 5K (C25K) Journey

I wanted to do some exercise, given it was a year and and half since I stopped doing regular workouts. My main goal was to feel healthier and fitter and knowing I could run for 30 minutes would be proof, to me, of good health. So I signed up for the Couch to 5K program, which takes you from “couch potato” fitness levels to running for 30 minutes in 9 weeks.

The following is a week by week recount of the whole program, which I started at the beginning of the year. I am very grateful I took notes along the way, because I can look back and see the progress and remember how I was doing along the way

How it works

There are plenty of apps, I used one from the UK NHS. Every week there are three planned runs: initially it will be alternating walking and running, building up to 20 minutes of running continuously. They recommend having rest days in between runs, to avoid injuries and improve fitness. If you cannot finish a run, it is obviously OK to stop and it is advised to repeat it before moving on to the next one. I personally really liked having a structure and slowly building a habit.

WEEK 1

First run was interesting. I found the first few rounds simple, but I hadn’t properly considered the fact that there were 8 rounds in total. I simply slowed down during the last two. They say the first run is the hardest, and that was now done!

The second and third run were quite easy, it was nice. Mixing up walking and running is good to switch things up a bit. I did notice the third run was harder, because it was very cold day [beginning of January].

WEEK 2

A slight increase in running time at the start of the week. Not particularly challenging. The app gives you tips along the way and this week’s one was focused on breathing. I didn’t always remember to do it “properly”, but I tried to do so if I was feeling tired.

Tip: Something which I find useful is accountability and motivation. I joined a facebook group on running and found it inspiring to see others pushing through and becoming better. I rarely use facebook, but I made it a point to check out the group if I wasn’t feeling like running. It helped for Run 3, since it was a gloomy day and I was considering skipping the run. I also started updating a friend who is also running, so we could motivate each other and keep each other accountable.

WEEK 3

Run 1 felt harder, running in intervals of 1.5 and 3 minutes instead of only 1.5. I was glad I did it! The hardest run for me is always the first one of the week, since there is a jump from the previous one. Once I complete it once, I know I can do it again.

Run 2 and 3 were easier, it’s actually impressive how much you can feel the difference.

Tip: I read online to “run with your hips”: they should be “driving” each step, you shouldn’t be bent forward. This is also similar to the advice that reminds you to look forward, keep your head up and stand tall. I recommend this if you are a beginner.

WEEK 4

Heard many people find this jump challenging and have to stop and repeat Week 3 runs before trying again, so I was a bit worried before going out. They also encourage you to “trust the program” and knowing that it had been created by experts did make me feel better. I also knew I could stop and repeat WEEK 3’s run if it was too hard.

Knowing this, I still did not go out running when I was supposed to. I wasn’t feeling well the day I was meant to go. The following day I was busy and then didn’t want to go outside in the dark.

Week 4 run 1 done! I was feeling a bit worried and I postponed it… I was meant to go a few days ago but didn’t, partly for actual reasons, partly from procrastination. But! I did it! I found it easier than W3R1.

So for anyone putting off a run, especially if starting a new week, I will repeat: trust the program!

A friend encouraged me to go and helped me figure out the best time for me to run and avoid excuses/reasons not to go

I didn’t run for six days because I had pulled a muscle and wanted to fully recover. I found myself itching to go for a run, though, which was a pleasant surprise.

Run 3 was harder than the second one. Probably because I started too fast on the first two runs. I need to be careful to not repeat this mistake in the future! Although it was really nice to see how much progress I made, the first run today felt like a breeze, while two weeks ago it felt challenging.

WEEK 5

Week 5 is different from the previous ones since all three runs are different from each other.

The third run will be 20 minutes of continuous running! It seems a lot and definitely an achievement, I couldn’t wait to try

The first run went well, easier than the last run of the previous week somehow. It might be related to the time of day, this time I went at 1pm, the other run was in an empty stomach at 8 am.

Second run down! 8 mins running, 5 walking and then another 8 running. Felt good, slowed down a bit at the end, although I learned my lesson and try to keep a steady pace rather than starting off with too much confidence. Next run is 20 minutes straight, no breaks. It feels like quite the step up, but I’ve been surprised by the program so far so I’m actually looking forward to Sunday.

I injured myself (not running), but I had to take a few days’ rest to avoid making things worse. I was quite gutted to be honest, I was looking forward to seeing if I could run 20 minutes.

I did the 20 minute run and I was pretty chuffed! I went slow and steady and it was easier than I thought.

Tip: Listen to a podcast. If you listen to music you will tend to match your pace with the beat of the song, so be mindful of that. There are playlists that have a specific number of bpm for this reason!

Having a podcast to pay attention to will distract your mind from the physical exercise.

The setback

I was travelling and then I got sick, so I didn’t run for a month. I picked up very slowly and went for a couple 5 minute jogs.

I then decided started back with week 5, since it had 5 minute runs to begin with, which I know I could do.

WEEK 6

It was satisfying to see I had not lost all my fitness and everything went pretty smoothly. The increase in the long run’s time was absolutely doable.

WEEK 7

From now on it’s continuous running, gradually increasing the time every week.

The program has already worked and built up a good foundation, so adding 3 minutes is not a big deal at this point. I always try to remember how good I feel afterwards, thanks to the endorphins and satisfaction.

WEEK 8

Nothing new to report. I will say I have noticed some days I felt in better shape than others – I used the slow running technique went I was getting tired, which is a great way to be able to run for longer.

WEEK 9

The satisfaction of running 30 minutes straight is definitely cool! I texted a few friends and I was buzzing 🙂

Final tips from a C25K graduate

  1. Trust the program
  2. Go slow
  3. Listen to a podcast or music if you want to be distracted
  4. Stop if something hurts
  5. The most difficult thing is getting out the door
  6. Accountability and encouragement
  7. Have a goal based on performance
  8. Repeat runs if you can’t finish one. Also good to keep this in mind if you stop running for more than 2 weeks
  9. Buy a good pair of shoes. You don’t have to spend hundreds of dollars, but proper running shoes will help avoid injuries
  10. Enjoy running! Be proud of how far you have come! Enjoy the process and celebrate what your body can do

How personal identity changes in time

What does identity change mean?

Your identity is, at its core, you you are. It is usually not one thing only, but you are a multitude of different things. For example you are a teacher and a son and a brother and a swimmer and a reader etc. Identity change is when you add a new thing that describes you to the list of identities you have. You can also remove something from your list, for example you can become a non-smoker – although I think identity is usually more about what you are, not having a specific behaviour can also define who you are just much.

How did my identity change?

It started with running, no doubt. Why? It gave me the confidence to go out and do stuff with others, knowing I could do it.

How did I get there?

With small steps, guided through a training plan. Not an all-in challenge I would fail and resent. The goal is to be challenged but not hate what you are doing, since you need to want to come back to it. At the beginning, the best thing is to do whatever it takes to sweeten the pill. After a while, it’s probably best to have a more sustainable and long term beneficial approach. For example, always running while listening to music will eventually become less enjoyable, as opposed to randomly running with music and without, according to research, as discussed in The Huberman’s Lab podcast.

Forming a new identity

In the book Atomic Habits, the author states that “Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become” and I find it to be true, based on my experience. I have slowly started doing the specific activity and eventually it became part of my identity and therefore doing it was something I naturally did because it’s just who I am.
If you say yes to 5 opportunities to go on a hike in a row, you will likely say yes to the 6th one. It’s your new normal. And eventually it might even be the case that you are the one suggesting going on hikes. This is because you enjoy the activity and also so that you can keep your actions aligned with your identity.
This is generally said about values, for example this article on LinkedIn article says “Let your core values define you. So if you feel a lack of fulfilment, reflect on the various identities or roles you have in life and work and see if they align with your core values”. This article links identity and roles, which can be translated into actions, to values.

I think a link can also be found between identity and actions. While our identities (and our values) can change over time, the fact that our actions are aligned with our identity can help us feel contentment and fulfilled.
So taking on a new identity comes from developing a new habit or a new way of living your life, but, in turn, it will lead you to do actions related to this identity more often and naturally.

The “negative” effects of identity change

Sometimes folks are subconsciously afraid of changing something and taking on a new identity because they are afraid this will impact their social life. For example if your friend group is based around being foodies and going for brunch every weekend and trying new restaurants and meals, an identity linked to home cooked meals or eating healthy might be seen as a turn off by the rest of the group. This is because by changing your habits you could be “undermining” the core activity of the friend group. Of course this is not necessarily the case and it might steer the group towards healthy restaurants, for example, or switching up going put for meals for cooking at home all together as a bonding activity instead.

Another dynamic that can happen is that your change effectively becomes a testament to your friends’ inability to change For example, let’s suppose you and your friends have always avoided going to the gym or you all smoke. If you start working out or quit smoking, this can be seen as something you were able to accomplish, while your peers did not change anything despite also wanting to do so, deep down. This might separate you from the group.

If you have experienced a shift in your identity, how did you feel and what did you notice?

Dopamine and social media

I listened to The Huberman Lab podcast episodes on dopamine and found the topic extremely interesting. It’s fascinating to me how everything is ruled by chemicals and neuroscience can explain so many aspects of our lives. 


In this article you will find out what dopamine is and how it affects us and what the link between dopamine, motivation and social media is. Please note that the social media use case is not used as an extensive example in the episodes I have listened to, but I believe the underlying mechanisms are the same and the example is correct.

What is dopamine?

Dopamine is a molecule that is associated with pleasure. You produce more dopamine when you eat a piece of chocolate, for example and certain activities release more dopamine than others.


There are two key things I learnt: 

  1. There is a pain pleasure balance
  2. Anticipation plays a big role

Let’s go through them in detail.

Pleasure pain balance

In her book Dopamine Nation, Dr Anne Lembke (interviewed on the podcast) explains that there is a balance between pleasure and pain, like a scale with two plates, or a see-saw. When one side is going up, the other goes down. But, the brain strives for balance. Therefore, if you engage in an activity that releases dopamine and tips the scale towards pleasure, it will subsequently try to balance it out. The issue is, it will overcompensate and you will feel in a lower mood than before.

That is to say, the pleasure side will have gone below baseline, where the balance is 50-50. To restore the level of before, you will try to get a new spike, by engaging in the activity again. However, you will then fall even lower. And the cycle can easily continue.

Anticipation

Dopamine is not only released by certain activities, but also by their anticipation. This is why the possibility of winning some money will make you want to gamble, for example.

Social media

There are many reasons why people use social media and each case is unique. Many people use social media to intentionally interact with friends and to stay on top of the news, for example. Sometimes, folks find themselves reaching for their phones when they are bored, stressed or upset.



This can be linked to the fact that social media provides users with many dopamine inducing moments.

You are always one post away from something potentially amazing (whatever that may be jn that circumstance: funny, informative, helpful, interesting). This triggers a dopamine release, because of the anticipation aspect. And the fact that not every post is, in fact, mind-blowing, means that your dopamine level will drop frequently, leading you to more scrolling, hoping for the next best thing. Novelty is another thing that is linked to dopamine, and we can easily find that on social media, too.



This is a very complex and interesting topic, if you have any further resources please share them in the comments below.

The GAP and the GAIN

I recently read the book The GAP and the GAIN by Dan Sullivan and Dr Benjamin Hardy, as I was intrigued by a review I saw about it.

In this post I will share the main takeaways and how I personally relate to the topics the authors discuss.

The definitions

You are in the GAP when you measure yourself or your situation against an ideal.  You are in the GAP when you think that “happiness” and “success” are something you “pursue” and will have in your future. The problem is that due do the hedonic adaptation process (discussed in the next paragraph) nothing ever will be enough, probably.

It’s human nature to be in the GAP. The GAIN is the antidote.

You are in the GAIN when you see the positives of a situation, when you learn from negative experiences and you measure yourself against your own past self and identify progress, instead of comparing yourself to others or an ideal.

Hedonic treadmill/adaptation

This is a term generally used in psychology to describe the fact that people tend to get used where they are at, what they have, etc. For example, if you want a promotion to buy yourself a new car, the new car will seem amazing at first but, soon, you will consider it your new “normal” and you will want something more. This cycle can easily become never ending, since there will always be something you don’t have if you compare yourself with others or an ideal.

You should, instead, measure your own progress and be proud of what you have overcome, what you have achieved and the steps you have taken already.

Transform an experience into a GAIN

Whenever you transform an experience into a GAIN— by creating new lessons, insights, or standards for yourself— you become better and your future becomes bigger

An experience gains value when you learn or reflect on it and you use these thoughts in the future. Of course an enjoyable experience has value in itself, but even then acknowledging this might encourage you to repeat this experience in the future. For unpleasant experiences, it’s easy to want to avoid thinking about them, but I have always found something to learn, when I have made the effort to reflect on them. I have a journal I write in, as I have found putting pen to paper helps me process feelings and thoughts calmly and I always come up with next steps and things to do to improve.

Progress not perfection [ok]

“When you’re in the GAIN, your progress becomes increasingly measurable to yourself and everyone around you. Yet, the more you’re in the GAIN, the less you compare, compete, or even care what other people think about you. 

You’re seeing new progress every day. You’re defining what your own experiences mean.” 

Psychology has shown that confidence does not create success, but rather, prior success creates confidence.

You should aim at having goals and working towards them with commitment, without becoming so attached to the destination that you don’t appreciate the journey. By having confidence and making progress, you will learn and improve and move forward, while being in no rush.

This is why, in some cases, I will set my goals so that they are output based rather than objective based. Instead of saying “I will do this by this day” I focus on how I plan to reach that deadline and focus on building a habit or routine that is measurable and that I track. And building and sticking to that habit becomes the goal itself.

Define your own success

The authors suggest spending 20 to 30 minutes reflectjng and writing about what success means to you and to figure out your personal success criteria. They suggest starting with the prompt “I know I’m being successful when…”. The idea behind this is to detatch yourself from the usual definition of success that society has taught us and to think about your own personal experience and values instead. This will allow you to feel successful without external validation and comparison. Another thing they highlight is that this definition might evolve overtime, as you gain new experience and knowledge.

Personally, I will reflect on this and on my values – I am curious to see if they are aligned and if they are in alignment with my day to day life. I suspect that I will find small things to change that will make me happier.

Plan for the real world

There is no point in being unrealistic and hoping everything will go smoothly. Things don’t always go as planned. What the authors suggest is to use a technique called implementation intention to guide you in these moments.

The idea is you come up with a plan for negative/not ideal situations you might find yourself in. This way, you will not have to think of the best action on the spot, but you will simply follow the steps you have planned. This might then lead you to creating a habit. In an example, they share how a sports coach would allow the players to be upset for 5 minutes after a lost match, and then they would have 10 minutes to think of the positives and improvement ideas.

I used to do something similar when an exam didn’t go well. I would be sad and upset and sometimes angry at myself for a short about of time, and then I would naturally start thinking about what went wrong and why. This made me learn from my mistakes and always led to actions to take to improve.

How to get out of the GAP?

The previous example shows how to get out of the GAP. It is a given that you will find yourself there at times, the goal is to get yourself out as soon as you can.

As they write in the book: “Here are five examples: After I compare myself with another person, I will say to myself, “Are you in the GAP or the GAIN?” After I feel discouraged, I will list 3 specific GAINS from the last 30 days. After someone tells me about a setback, I will say, “What did you GAIN from this experience?” After I start my weekly team meeting, I will ask, “What was your biggest GAIN yesterday?” After I open my journal, I will immediately write about one GAIN in my life.”

This section made me think of the weekly review I regularly do and how reflecting back on recent events always makes you see them in a more positive light and gives you the possibility to learn, especially if you use curiosity instead of judgment.

Track progress – always be learning

This section of the book is about tracking progress- it’s extremely important to be regularly reminded of past GAINS, so that you can look back and see how far you’ve come and the progress you have made.

In a way similarly to the hedonic treadmill, it’s easy to forget that you were previously struggling with something that might have become easy for you. Or you take for granted how far you’ve come and effectively ignore your progress.

The authors suggest thinking about recent wins and desired wins for the future. Reflecting on what you were focused on one year ago, how your life has changed since then and what you have learned in this last year ensures you are in the GAIN and you are growing as a person. An interesting prompt is about how your beliefs and definition of success have changed. 

I usually do this at the end of the year or at the half year mark, and it is always interesting to look back on.

Night routine

Throughout and especially towards the end of the book, the authors share practical tips on how to implement the ideas in the book. One of the topics is the daily routine around bedtime. They suggest putting phone on airplane mode 30 to 60 minutes before bed. This time should be used to wind down and reflect about the day, as well as plan for the next day. 

The first thing recommend is writing down three things you’re grateful for each and specific “wins” you had that day (they recommend 3) as it boosts your gratitude and your confidence.

Writing down three wins daily is one of the most effective ways to stay out of the GAP. You feel like you’re always winning and making progress. It keeps you in a state of momentum and confidence

Then you should write down the three wins you’d like to accomplish the next day. It’s important to not overdo it, but to be realistic, so writing more than three is discouraged. Of course you can do more than three things in a day, but it’s good to focus on the top three things in terms of impact when it comes to measuring success.

In the 5 Minute Journal, the last daily prompt is related to what could have made your day better. It’s phrased so that you reflect on how you could have improved things personally. I think this is a great way to learn from the past and improve

As you can see from the extensive post, there are many interesting points made in the book and it touches upon several topics. I would recommend it to anyone who is interested in having a more positive outlook and wants to understand the importance of measuring progress rather than comparing yourself or your situation and is looking for ways to do that.

« Older posts

© 2023 Laura's Learnings

Theme by Anders NorenUp ↑

%d bloggers like this: